The Plunge

The holo-display flickered to life, a various assortment of windows spreading bit by bit into a crescent pattern for full view. To the left was the typical numerical hell of notifications, stocks, and charts. The right display seemed to be reserved for communications: channels, a secure and controlled video feed, and section for quick access to mails. To the center display was what seemed an area of general workflow, easily adjusted and customized efficiently for what subject needed handled at the time. At this moment, an old mail was pinned to the corner, along with a war history report from CONCORD and Sanxing’s corporation symbol. What was most prominent, however, was highlighted text from a news story.

There have been a number of groups and individuals in the Federation who have called for the prompt resignation of Executor Hinkelmann, and the reinstatement of former Executor John Revenent as well as the rest of former I-RED leadership, including former Vice-Executor Korbin Lavius.

Julianni read, then reread the text over and over. Briefly, she glanced to the right at her mail notification flickering, letting out a small sigh. Her hand reached up to rub at her brow, closing her eyes for a brief moment. At least, it certainly felt like a brief moment, but the next thing she knew, her eyes opened again to find that some ten minutes had passed. Ten minutes wasted.

She stood, tiredly making her way to her tea set and placing her hand to the pot. Cold. Another small sigh escaped her lips and she shook her head. Though it would be another small waste of time, she knew she needed the tea to keep herself awake, and so she began to head out of her office, placing on as much of an alert and normal expression as she could muster.

The moment she opened her office door, she was met with two guards who immediately brought themselves to attention. Her brow raised. They were still here? Nevertheless, she offered a bow of her head and slowly began making her way down the hall to the lounge. As soon as she began to move, one of the guards began to as well, trailing right behind her. She paused, glancing over her shoulder.

“I’m just going to get some hot water,” she said, lifting up the pot of tea as if to show proof of her intention.

The Internal Watch member replied quickly and sternly. “Orders, ma’am.”

“I…er…I know there are orders for security. But…” She stopped herself short, simply shaking her head again. “Nevermind. I apologize.”

It was strange, really. One would think it would make someone feel safe to have such a security detail. However, to Julianni, it felt almost oppressive, especially since it had only increased over the last week. She didn’t believe for one second that I-RED’s enemies would act out against her. While she may have been a director and oversaw a number of things, there was a great deal more that she wasn’t privy to behind closed doors. She’d be useless for significant information.

The only other person that could act out was, as far as she knew, a significant distance away and she was sure he’d never be so foolish as to try anything again. He was smarter than that. No, if he had anything planned…

“Avala-haani?”

Her attention was brought back to focus and she realized her arrival at the lounge. The bartender looked at her with a raised brow, his hands held out for the pot of tea.

“Kalkiihanzu,” she answered, handing him the tea pot and then bowing deeply. “I was lost in my thoughts.”

“I noticed. Maybe you should get some rest. I can prepare some Onitseru Blue instead of your Matigu Green. I think it would do you some good.”

“Oh, no, please. It’s quite alright. I have a few more things to take care of. But I sincerely appreciate the offer,” she replied with a comforting smile.

The bartender smiled back, turning to refill the pot with hot water. “Very well. When you’re ready for rest, just let me know if you’re interested in the Onitseru.” After refilling the pot, he slipped it back across the counter. His eyes moved to the Internal Watch member, offering a dip of his head, but then looked back at Julianni with a small brow raised.

She offered no explanation, instead bowing and taking up the pot. “I’ll certainly do that. Rikaato.” Without another word, she quickly moved to head back to her office, guard in tow.

When she arrived again, the Internal Watch member took his position back up outside her office, ensuring the door was shut behind her. Each time she entered the office, the smell of lavender caused such conflicting emotions. Even though they had since been discarded, the scent wouldn’t disperse. While the memory of the flowers themselves had been a good one, it was now ruined with the affiliation to Dominius. Her stomach twisted, a familiar nausea creeping its way up. Doing what she could to shake it off, Julianni took a deep breath, setting the pot back into it’s place to let the tea steep properly.

Finding herself back at her desk, she took note of a new video request to the right, appearing to be from yet another Internal Watch member. Once accepting the request, the feed connected, showing the guard bowing. “Saisieni, Avala-haani. I’ve been asked to contact you in regards to Isoke-haani’s husband we have in holding. He is demanding to see someone about his wife’s disappearance.”

Julianni nodded, keeping her expression calm. “Very well. Let him know I’ll come down to holding by the day’s end.”

“Yes ma’am,” came the soldier’s reply along with an immediate disconnect.

Once the feed was cut, Julianni’s hand reached to rub at her face lightly, only to be interrupted by another video feed request. She’d initially expected it to be more business, but the name and the CONCORD portrait of Dominius Degario made her sink into her chair. The notification continued to blink until she stood and simply walked away from her desk, heading to her office door again.

The Internal Watch members straightened to attention as they’d done before, and her original escort then turned, ready to follow. She said nothing, and giving no protest; there would be no use. Hall after hall, elevator after elevator, she and the guard traveled through until they found themselves in front of the door to the small chapel.

Much to Julianni’s relief, the guard took up post outside the door without a word, but gave her a small nod. She mustered up as much of a smile as she could in thanks to him, then stepped inside. It was empty, as it generally was around this hour. As the look of relief washed across her face, she moved into a closed off, private prayer room to the side, shutting the door behind her.

It was a comforting place, to be sure, and probably one of the very few places she could take solace in. It was lit by candles, the soft light of flames flickering shadows across a miniature statue devoted to God. Perhaps too simple for those with expensive tastes, but it was all she needed. Slowly, she lowered herself to her knees, linking her fingers and lowering her forehead onto them. Her prayers began softly, reciting as she’d done so many times. For many minutes this went on until finally, they were completed.

Opening her eyes, she looked up to the statue and listened. One would think that a moment of peace and quiet would be cherished. In a life full of duties and busy days, a chance to simply relax and let the mind rest would of course be treasured.

To Julianni, the silence was deafening. It was a moment for her mind to pick apart each and every moment that had happened as of late. But the worst part of all, was the fact that those memories she’d once pushed away were now like a wound reopened, flowing freely with the raw emotions she’d felt from it all. No longer were her prayers in such private rooms a place of comfort. They were now a reminder of what she had to do in the past. Her head lowered and she placed her hands over her face, breaking down into tears.

Next

Happy Birthday

“Of course. And any extra supplies?” Julianni paused in front of her studio’s doorway and chuckled softly. “More coffee? Alright. But you’re alright on the others?” After a brief moment of reply on her conversation partner’s part, she answered. “Very well, Doctor. Please stay safe. Know that you have my prayers.” A moment later, she cut the voice feed from her ear piece and pulled out her datapad, making a small note. After slipping it back away, she entered her code into the studio’s keypad and stepped inside.

The soft lights flickered into being at her arrival, revealing the place that she had called “home” for some time. Though the floors, counters, and other base parts of the place were Caldari in design, decorations and furnishings dotted it that gave it the feel of a well-furnished home in the Amarr Empire. She understood why it was done, and she had appreciated the sentiment when the place was arranged for her, but it was not much of a comfort.

She stepped further into the lifeless studio, carefully slipping out of her heels while making her way to the small kitchen. Once pouring a glass of red wine, she turned to face the place fully, thinking deeply. Despite how the reeducation program had “succeeded” and her continued, unfettered faith in God, she couldn’t help but feel torn. It was as if she was caught between two worlds, not fitting in fully in either.

An official Caldari citizen, sure; she knew the language, the customs, the history. While she may not have been perfect with it, she took efforts to gain more knowledge every day. She felt close to the others, and nothing would likely change that. But she didn’t belong, and she knew it. Julianni was, by all her belief, an outsider.

Her ties to the Amarr Empire still remained, as well. While no longer under the Degario family, she certainly kept a strong faith, and nothing could come in the way of that. She enjoyed keeping up with the relations between I-RED and its Amarr allies. It was a chance to join with others in Faith. But she didn’t feel as if she belonged there either. In her mind, she was just as much an outsider for not having chosen to return there when she had the chance.

Even with the various people she had met who weren’t even affiliated with I-RED, she felt distant. And the one time she felt herself growing closer, her self-doubt and fears only proved to confirm her perceived misplacement. A cup of tea, a garden visit, a simple bit of correspondence: all of these, while comforting and enjoyable at the time, felt strange to her. She knew she didn’t belong.

It was lonely.

With those thoughts running through her head, she’d hardly noticed that her glass of wine had since been drained. A small sigh escaped her lips and she set it to the counter and replaced her heels. While she’d felt exhausted from the numerous things she’d been understandably assigned to, she knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep. Besides, there were a number of projects she could be working on instead.

Once back in her small office, she strangely grew a bit comforted by the close quarters, simple furnishings, and lack of windows. It was unimpressive, sure, but it was all she really needed. After taking a seat at her desk, she pulled up her holo display and began sifting through the month’s finances. A rather boring task, to be sure, but she was happy to serve.

A small knock came at her open doorway, pulling her out of the depths of numerical hell, and she glanced up to see a strange sight. One of the members of the Internal Watch seemed to be there, a small vase of lavender in one of his hands. She almost did a double-take, recognizing the beautiful flowers from many, many years ago.

After a stiff bow, he spoke. “Apologies for the interruption, Avala-haani. These were sent to you by a Lord Degario for your birthday, it seems.” He smiled somewhat, then placed the vase on the small desk between the two guest chairs. “I was not aware it was your birthday, myself. Happy birthday.”

Julianni’s expression shifted to surprise and she blinked a few times. “What’s the date?”

“The nineteenth.”

“Oh…so it is.” There was a small bit of embarrassment on her part. A birthday, to her, was nothing to pay much attention to, nor had it been something celebrated while she was within the Degario manor. To say this had taken her by surprise would have been an understatement. “Thank you,” she finally said, slowly standing.

“He requested a video conference with you as well, if you’re accepting of it,” the guard continued.

Her further shock was apparent, and as she stood before the vase of lavender from the Degario garden, she felt a certain sense of happiness that she would get the chance to speak with her Holder once again. “Of course. Please, let the connection through. Thank you.”

The Internal Watch member gave another stiff bow, then left, the door shutting behind him. Julianni stooped slightly to smell the lavender, a small comforting memory gracing her with it’s arrival. She heard the connection of her video feed first, turning to immediately bow. Her hair fell past her shoulders and eyes closed for a brief moment. “Lord Degario.”

What was a comforting and anticipated moment soon turned to the exact opposite, however, when the voice that replied was not her Holder.

“The title still is rather new on me, but I must admit it sounds quite wonderful coming from you.”

It was enough to send chills down her spine, freezing her entirely in place.

“Ah, you must not have been aware of my father’s passing. I apologize for breaking it to you in such a way. Nevertheless, it is wonderful to see you again, Julianni. We have much to discuss,” Dominius said.

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